Ohaiyo Gozaimasu

Hello, my name is Suika. I am a mystical oni from the far off land of Gensokyo. I enjoy drinking and fighting.

I hope we can all be good friends!

Stop, stop!
This is madness! I won't have strange mystical creatures running around my forum!

What do you have against oni? Sure, we've had our rough patches with you humans... but hey, shouldn't we all forgive and forget? Besides, I've hardly carried off any human children in the past hundred years.

Now tell me, have you befriended the manticorn?

Yeah, I know Yuugi. I drink with her all the time!

Pic related, it's me drinking with the manticorn.

what is going on???

Oh, a cat! Are you a nekomata? Have you met Chen?

i dont know what you just said. who are you even?

Didn't I already tell you? My name is Suika Ibuki.

shawhat? i am just as confused as most. is this new person just em?? and i dont think drinking is appropriate for the age that you have put young mystical creature. i didnt know mystical creatures had access to the interwebs. how oh so interesting. where do you go on the computer? i wouldnt think you would have time because of mystical things to do because your mystical. HAVE YOU EVER MET A NARWHALEASOROUS? yes i just made that up. doesnt that make it mystical?? also, i has one more thing to say. hello and welcome even though i have NO IDEA (wink wink nudge nudge em) who you are.

Wow, so many questions! You humans sure are skeptical though. Why is it so hard to believe who I am?

First off, don't worry about the drinking age, I'm waaaaay older than my account says I am. The system wouldn't let me put my age as over 100, so it's not really accurate. You're right about computers; there really aren't any of 'em here in Gensokyo. I got here by asking Yukari if there was any way to talk with humans in your world, and she hooked me up to your "internets". You humans sure do build some weird things! I have more than enough time to browse your "internets" as well; Gensokyo can be so boring at times. A while back I tried to liven things up with nightly parties at the Hakurei shrine, but it didn't work out too well. Lastly, I'm not sure why you would think I've met a narwhaleasorous if you just made it up right now. Do you have the power to invent creatures just by thinking them up? That's pretty powerful! We should have a fight some time!

Thanks for the welcome!

uh okay then

Okay okay
Here is my question
Who you gonna call?

Why would I call somebody? I don't understand your question.

Well, who is the more adapted species now, huh, little ONI?!
I must say that the human race ranks superior at this very moment, for any creature having its patches, rough or smooth they may be, with humans would KNOW that you would call the muffin man. The guy who lives on Drury Lane. Surely you little things know of such pastry? Of such a delectable concoction? Or a chubby, crafty fellow such as the muffin man? Hm?

BUT WAIT OH SAMI! this creature should also have the knowledge to know that you could call GHOSTBUSTERS as well! you see "oni" (if that is your real name) the phrase who ya gonna call? is usually associated with the movie(s) from the 80's starring the ever so jolly bill murry, dan akroyd, sigourney weaver, and harold ramis. do you know who these people ARE?? anyway, i agree with sami on this one as well, you may call the muffin man. his pastries are oh so delectable.

Inferior species?! That's not very nice at all! My, you humans are so rude! And my name isn't oni, it's Suika! But I won't get mad at you, it's not really worth it. I bet you can't even fire danmaku.

I've never seen a "movie", so I don't know who your Ghostbusters are or why I would want to call them. They look kinda silly in those jumpsuits. I've never eaten a muffin either; we don't get too much of your food here in Gensokyo. Most of what we eat is very traditional: rice, fish, sake and whatnot. You hear a lot of scary stories about oni eating humans, but I really prefer not to. You guys are so stringy!

HA YOU WOULD CALL GHOSTBUSTERS BECAUSE hmmm i dunno lets analyze their name for a moment..
ghost: the soul of a dead person, a disembodied spirit imagined, usually as a vague, shadowy or evanescent form, as wandering among or haunting living persons.
busters or to bust: a person who breaks up something: crime busters

so maybe their name means TO DESTROY GHOSTS IN THE MOST EPIC JUMPSUITS EVER.
you know your not very smart for a mystical creature from another world. you could THINK a little instead of being all innocent and posting pictures of a drawing....

Okay enough of the sass!
I admit even my sass was a tad unnecessay.
How about a peace treaty, Suika?
We shall import some desirable products to your nation if you can create a satisfactory re-production of the highly respected musical Cats.

thats wrong. cats isnt that highly respected. this topic is frustrating. BUT. we should also bring the truly well-respected television show GLEE into their world. we all know that it will benefit everyone quite a bit.


i have no pictures cause im on my dads computer. use your imaginations.

No, Maris, you just WISH Cats wasn't highly respected.
However, we all know deep in our hearts and in newspaper reviews from the '80s that it IS.
So HA.
Oh, and aren't you on a plane right now?
Do you have internet on the plane? Is that possible?
Or did you just post that comment before you lifted off?

You humans are so odd. Here in Gensokyo, it's considered really rude to talk about things that people don't know about in the tones that you guys are using. I'm starting to understand why all the oni left your world.

there were "oni" in our world?? craziness.

Suika, stop talking with these people! They don't know about oni.

Oh, Reimu! I didn't know you were using the "internets" too!

Why does it matter if they don't know what oni are? I'm just givin' them a history lesson, that's all. I can talk to the humans as much as I want to.